Seven days until my first three month scan. One part of me is how has it been three months already? Job well done to us in keeping ourselves incredibly busy, the time has flown and we’ve managed to have a lot of fun. On the other hand, what a bumpy road it has been.
My scans are next Monday morning. My doctor appointments are Tuesday afternoon.
I heard a lot about “scanxiety” once I was declared cancer free. I pushed it off to the side, thinking it can’t be that bad. Ha. The last week and a half have been tough. My closest compadres have turned into therapists that I should be billing on an hourly cycle! #earlyretirement
I woke up this morning wanting to challenge myself. That vacation was really well timed! And you know me, forever competing. Option A: I could let the next seven days eat me alive. Or, Option B: I can do everything in my power to make the most of the next seven days, knowing no amount of fear, worry or anxiety are going to actually change what shows on those scans.
I’m challenging myself to the latter, Option B. Theme of our lives. Faith > Fear. Attitude is everything. Cancer is a war, an endless physical battle (ask my joints) but I’m a huge believer that the battle is also hugely mental. If you treat yourself like a cancer patient, you will become one. If you let it rule, it will win. If you attack it and do everything you can to remain yourself, your true self, you win. I’ve tried to fight everyday to maintain as much normalcy as possible, we’ve already lost enough.
So for the next seven days, I’m going to fill my calendar with fun, food, friends & family. I joined a kickboxing gym (talk about incredible therapy!!). I’m challenging myself to go four times this week even though its hard. We are seeing a stand up show, going to a Sox game and celebrating a baptism. I am going to do my absolute best to trust God’s bigger plan, even in the hardest of moments over the next week. I’m going to beat scanxiety!
And ultimately, we are going to pray like crazy that those scans come back clear and we’ll get another three months to tackle together and another three months and another three months until its years and years past this. We would love you forever if you joined us!
Thank you Team Beef!